God has been speaking to me about something. I've been pondering the issue and seeking guidance in the Scriptures. Last night a note in my Bible from 20 years ago caught my attention and focused my thoughts.
I've been noticing that I feel unsettled when brothers and sisters in Christ share with me that they've told others not to worry about not meeting a commitment because "Sandra will understand". I'm glad that people don't see me as a demanding, judgmental and unforgiving person, but somehow it's uncomfortable to think that my opinion is being used as a standard for anybody in terms of their Christian life. Let me see if I can clarify.
I believe that God tells His people what He expects from us. The Bible is full of specific directions and general principles to guide our behavior. For example, those who love God are to follow the dictates of the Ten Commandments (Exodus 20) in how we live, not only on the outside but also on the inside (Matthew 5:28). We are expected to worship God and Him only and details are given about what true worship looks like and what it requires. (Genesis 22:1-5, 24:26,27,47,48; Hebrews 12:28,29; John 4:24) There is a whole list of duties for the Christian from tending our personal relationship with God through body life and into the sharing of the Gospel.
Obedience to God's mandates is not a matter of what feels comfortable, or seems to be the best idea, or follows a majority vote. Our loving Father has clearly communicated His directions to His chosen offspring. The Lord Jesus explains, "If you love me, you will obey what I command." (John 14:15) That means spending consistent time in prayer, meditating on and memorizing His Word, plumbing the depths of the Scriptures through study, and being part of a corporate body that worships regularly. Among other characteristics, we are to be truth tellers and word keepers. (Acts 5:1-11; James 5:12) These are some of the basics of what might be called Christian duties. It's up to those who are truly members of God's family to bring our lives in line with His standards by His design and guidance. (Philippians 2:13)
God compares His people to a human body with various, interrelated parts that are valuable and necessary one to another. (1 Corinthians 12:12-31) We are meant to be in community where we encourage and challenge each other with hearts full of praise and gratitude for all that our heavenly Father has done for us. (Romans 12:15,16; Colossians 3:15,16) We are to look to the interests of others as we avoid judgementalism, being cautious to tend to the places where our lives do not meet His measure. (Philippians 2:4; Matthew 7:1-5)
These points of understanding are some of those I incorporate as I run the race set before me. (Hebrews 12:1,2) They are why when someone explains the reason they didn't meet a certain responsibility I do my best to offer a gracious response. My Daddy knows how far short I fall of His standards and accepts me as I am, not because I in myself am desirable, but because I am encased with the righteousness of His Beloved Son. He is full of forgiveness and grants me grace out of the richness of His mercy. (Exodus 33:19, Romans 9:15, Ephesians 2:4) How can I offer less to my siblings?
I trust that God knows what the circumstances were and the obedient response that was required. He knows each heart and what it needs - perfectly. It's not up to me to judge the soundness of the reason nor the condition of my sibling's heart. I admit that it's a bit more difficult at some times than others. There was the day I was told that Sunday morning was the only time someone's refrigerator could receive its necessary weekly cleaning. Then there are the moments when the thought floats through my mind that a sibling seems quite able to schedule all manner of activities but is somehow incapable of attending a Bible study or prayer meeting or accomplishing a task they arranged. I do better on some days than others and rejoice that God's Word is living and active, accomplishing His purpose - enlightening my mind and disciplining my heart. (Hebrews 4:12, Exodus 55:11)
The crux of my dilemma is that I am beginning to feel that some of my siblings may be misreading/mistaking my gracious response as a release from their Christian duty. My compassionate remark cannot be the final step in the process we all need to undertake as we pursue holiness. (1 Peter 1:15,16) I need to check my own heart and life. Do I allow the understanding of others when I display my weaknesses to be my measure of approval or acceptance? How do I receive the empathy offered by a sister who may have struggled in a similar way or her encouragement to persevere under God's principles? Do I adjust my personal expectations to match those of others? Or do I bring the whole collection of circumstances, behaviors and attitudes to my loving Father in prayer and through His Word? Do I aim primarily at His standards and priorities for righteousness in my inner life and outward behavior? (Matthew 6:33)
Paul makes it clear whose standard we are to meet. Just because Sister Suzy says she's not upset when I say I haven't been able to attend a meeting or meet a commitment I made doesn't make it okay. God knows what the situation was. He knows how tired I really was and whether or not I used that as an excuse because my heart wasn't really open to worship or pray or study, or if I simply changed my mind about doing what I said I would do. It doesn't really matter what anybody else thinks.
"Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices holy and pleasing to God-this is your spiritual act of worship." (Romans 12:1) God is the only name listed. God is the One we are to please. Yes, we need to be gracious to our siblings. We are to urge and inspire each other in developing godly attitudes and actions. (Hebrews 10:24) We must not become standard-setters for each other. Our Savior and King is the authority to whom we must yield.
While we enjoy the horizontal relationship with which our Father has blessed us, let's be careful not to let it become a poor, sinful and dangerous substitute for our intimate relationship with Him - not on any level, for any reason, at any time. A dear sister expresses it this way, "We are to play to an audience of One."
Thank you, Lord, for granting the opportunity to communicate this glimpse into the spiritual life you nurture in us. Please cause each of us you've called to yourself to glorify you and enjoy you forever. Amen
